I hate when I set goals and then fail to meet them. It’s certainly not a life and death issue, but the voice inside of me usually makes me feel extremely bad. All of us have that voice inside that berates us when we have failed in one way or another. The voice speaks when we have done things like, putting off something for later (which never get done) and then we never get back to it.
That’s when the voice starts! Saying things like, “You always put things off. Can’t you do any better?” Well, you get the idea-it’s not a voice of grace and encouragement. It is a voice of self-condemnation.
It’s not like you can cut the voice off altogether, but you don’t have to let it get the better of you. Also, that voice could have some truth in it (some God in it) and you would do well to listen to it and change some things in your life. The key is to not let is condemn you, but instruct you. It shouldn’t make you feel an unhealthy guilt. It should cause you to examine what part is true, and then make an honest effort to do better the next time.
Don’t allow the voice to harm you; let the voice help you. Find the God part of the voice and weed out the negative part of the voice that tries to mix with God’s loving voice.
Here are a few tips to help you stop beating yourself up
1. Don’t step on your own heart
Stop being so hard on yourself. You are loved and approved by God. You don’t need to prove anything in order to gain love. You have love. God loves you no matter what. Part of stepping on your own heart comes form not believing you are good enough. Self-punishment never works. Self-punishment will never take the fear away. The bible tells us that perfect love cast out fear. Hold on to that promise.
2. Stop believing you are a failure
You need to kick the word failure in the face with your God foot. Constantly entertaining the word ‘failure’ in your life can emotionally debilitate you. God often speaks into our life to instruct us, or to convict us, but it’s never so that we feel like a failure. God has called you His own and builds through your weaknesses with grace and mercy. Always remember, when you are weak He is strong.
3. Let God love the weak and ugly side of you
Once again, we are back to love. We always give God our good side. Try giving Him your weak and ugly side. You would be amazed at what He can do with the messy stuff in your life. Place your ugly stuff in His hands and leave it there. Remember the guy in the bible (Luke 18) that was bragging about all his good work and God said he wasn’t justified? Then another guy comes in a very humble way, and gives God his ugly side and God says that guys left and was justified.
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